Alright, be honest. Have you stuck with your New Year’s Resolution?
No? Cool.
Forget normal. I wanted to be Axl Rose.
The Numbers Don’t Lie
According to Pew Research, Nearly half of adults under 30 made at least one resolution this year, compared to only about a fifth of those 50 and older.
But here’s the interesting part: about a month in, 87% of resolution-makers have stuck with some of their goals. Only 59% maintain all of them. What does this tell us? That partial success is actually the norm—and maybe we should stop treating it like failure.
The Problem With January 1st
As Kathy Caprino writes in Forbes, “The hype, pressure and guilt rarely lead to lasting change.” She’s right. New Year’s resolutions come loaded with invisible baggage:
The Calendar Myth: The tradition implies you can only change on January 1st. But real transformation doesn’t wait for a date on the calendar. Every single day offers a fresh start.
Vague Goals Disguised as Ambition: “Be healthier” or “get in shape” sound noble, without being more specific, they won’t work. How will you actually do it? Drink less alcohol? Eat more vegetables? Hit the gym more? Without specific steps, resolutions fail faster than they are made. When I wanted to start sleeping through the night again, after years of not, I looked into ways to calm my mind. One is to put my phone on Do Not Disturb, (or off) and on the other side of the room. And putting it out of reach for at least one hour before going to bed.
The Instant Results Trap: When we want something, we want to get it yesterday. Patience isn’t a strength most of us cultivate (myself included). But meaningful change takes time, and our resolution mindset doesn’t account for that. Nor do we see all the work famous athletes do be anyone knows who they are.
The Conformity Pressure: Here’s the hidden problem—people often make resolutions to be like everyone else. To fit a mold. To stop standing out. Being like everyone else may keep the peace, conformity rarely makes anyone happy. I speak from experience.
Accepting the differences.
When I was a kid, I just knew I was different from my classmates—I just didn’t know what made me different. Maybe it was coming from a broken home while everyone else’s parents stayed together. Maybe it was because I found dating boring while my classmates went on dates. Maybe it was because I’d rather be in my room listening to music (usually Guns N Roses) rather than spending hours at the mall.
Why GN’R? When my female classmates swooned over teen idols, I idolized Axl Rose. Not in the Beatle-mania way they loved their pop stars—Axl Rose was something else entirely. He screamed like an enraged banshee because he came from a rough childhood, as did I, yet his was more difficult. He got to express frustrations I couldn’t.
I couldn’t vent frustrations because, making noise like that would’ve gotten me in trouble—even though there was already plenty of shouting and fighting, sometimes physical in my house. So much that it never felt like there was any love.
Also I didn’t even understand why I was so upset. I liked my music loud. Not my home. The loud music usually drowned out the volatile fighting going on in my home. Music was something I could control. It has a volume button. The noise in your head and house doesn’t. Music can also be turned off whenever it was needed.
My unconventional taste put even more strain on my already fragile relationship with my single dad, who raised me and my older brother. Music was one of the few things we had in common. I liked his music way more than he liked mine. He liked The Beach Boys and the Rat Pack. They’re cool. I still prefer louder music. And that was okay. We weren’t going to agree on everything.
The Real Way Forward
Here’s what I learned from being the weird kid who loved Guns N’ Roses instead of boy bands: you don’t have to change just because the calendar says it’s time to or someone else’s expectations. Expectations that are probably madly outdated.
Change works when:
You start small. Don’t overhaul your entire life on January 1st. Take one tiny step. Then another. Small changes compound over time.
You get specific. Replace “be healthier” with “add one vegetable to dinner three nights a week.” Replace “exercise more” with “go for a 15-minute walk every Monday and Thursday.”
You give yourself permission to be different. You’re not changing to become like everyone else. You’re evolving into the most authentic version of yourself.
You remember that timing is flexible. January 1st isn’t the magical day that promises changes will stick. You can be to evolve any time you want and are willing to do the work.
You practice patience. Real transformation takes time. The goal isn’t overnight perfection—it’s sustainable progress.
You don’t need to wait for a new year to become a new you. You just need to take the next small step—whenever you’re ready.
You can have your boy bands. Give me Guns N’ Roses.
Reinventing yourself 
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