Comfort Zones and Being Still (for a few minutes.)

Two vague phrases that are being thrown around in the mental health industry without a definition. Or at least a “proper” definition. That’s because tending to your mental health is considered taboo…

Imagine continuously going to a job you despise so much, you spend your precious time off laying on the couch, trying to get caught up on the sleep you couldn’t get because your mind is running riot imaging what’s going to happen at your dreaded place of employment the next time you go in. You wonder:

“Am I getting fired? I am and I won’t find another job again. Ever!”
“Did I complete that report?”

“Is my boss mad at me?” While avoiding them as though your life depends on it.

“Am I making the daily quota?”

You get the idea.

Yet you keep going to that shit show you call a job because of the steady paycheck your employer gives you. Even though it’s barely enough to pay your bills and put food on the table. Which are essential.

That, folks is a comfort zone. Sort of funny because you’re not really comfortable. You’re just used to it. That doesn’t mean you like it. And you’re scared senseless about doing anything to improve your situation.

Possibly because you have no idea what to do.

Now for being still.

It’s not something we here in the United States are taught. Honestly any form of rest is frowned upon. (Thanks hustle culture…)

A lot of people can’t be still because if you were, it would put you in the line of someone else’s rage. Rage you were not the cause of. Ok, maybe you did something like not taking the trash out when they asked. That’s no reason for them to have such an epic meltdown which they take out on you.

This is one reason people dread being still. Dread it to the point they just can’t. Yet need to watch crap, mindless TV as a distraction. Or self medicate.

Maybe you’ve tried being still and again you just can’t. It takes practice and maybe it’s because issues from your past are trying to surface. And why is that? Because those issues want to be acknowledged. Not numbed or suppressed. Acknowledged.

When you’re being still your past stuff can come up. If you’re doing it right or even when you’re not trying. If your past is causing you to not being able to eat, sleep, any of the basic functionalities of life, please seek guidance. Yes, in the form of therapy. It’s not a sign of weakness. (Guys I’m looking at you.) Nor is there any shame in it or because of it.

Maybe you were:

Lied to. And you believed those lies.

Conned.

Duped.

Abused.

Did some boneheaded shit. (Little secret, we all have.)

Being still also makes people think about what would’ve happened if they made one or several decisions differently.

In reality and conclusion, you made the best decision you could with the information you had at the time. Admitting you made mistakes shows growth. You don’t have to shout it from any rooftops. Just admit it to yourself.

Any thoughts, questions? Let’s discuss.